Monday, June 8, 2009

Venturing in His Confidence...

Day One:
I made it up North, so here I am. In the days that come to follow, you will hear stories that intertwine together, that my stay here is of such, composed. There may be times that don't make sense to the reader, however in some way it has made sense to me. Thus, I will publish even the insignificant in some eyes.

Day Two:
So this stranger has ventured out into another day. Toured the building for a second time and shared a story, known as mine. Shared in the staff meeting and the feeling of home finally began to resonate. Taken to a small-town restaurant, ventured in the company of the Spanish language. Recounted memories and making children bulletins also accompanied my day in this new world. After a twelve-and-a-half hour day one among a bout of sickness and lack of caffeine, and a day without getting lost....I can finally say that this is where I belong for the time being.....

Day Three:
Sigh*. I made it home before 9, and I must admit that this work though less strenuous, it doesn't make it any less tiresome. Perhaps, I am still adjusting to the new environment.Or maybe something completely different. I am unsure. Lou has definitely mastered my hermit life and turned it upside down--scheduling lunch after lunch. Today, I had lunch with the middle school youth guy, Jake, and was slightly nervous about the idea. Yet, he took me out for Chinese, and conversation came a lot easier than I had hoped. So I know that God was there, because His words are becoming more evident with each passing day, where two or three are gathered, there You are...So I managed to not get lost, and have a proper amount of caffeine intake, and I have lunch and dinner plans tomorrow. I absolutely am growing to adore the people I work with, especially Mary Beth. There is just a comfort level that has certainly been there since day one, which seems like years ago, but it was only two...And when Josh and I ventured out to eat, Sue made sure he was taking care of me..So in certain ways, I already feel at home here and the pace seems to not be so foreign. Of course, there are just aspects that will take more time. Yet, I know that God opened this door for a reason...So I shall keep moving from day to day....I am not sure of the work I am doing is in fact significant, or if I am helping....Though I will just keep at work, because this is all for Him.. No matter if it is just making copies or decorating a room. I will just keep lending a hand for these dear people here. I am just behind the scenes, but that is certainly okay with me. Thank You Father, for bringing me here. I pray that you would use my life to be a blessing to these dear souls around me, that I might provide the encouragement and help that is needed while I am here. Dear Father, I pray that You would continue to mold me into a woman after your own heart, break my heart for what breaks yours. God,use me to the fullest. I love you and I am so grateful that You are here with me....

Day Four:
So what I have seemed to ascertain these past few days is that my story is quite hard to gather. Miles have been shed in my journey, and a good amount of distance. It is hard to explain and understand,though I know that God has indeed orchestrated each and every moment, each and every mile. Gratitude indeed rests upon my heart, because Jesus has gone ahead, and it isn't about me taking Him somewhere else. He is already there, and the beauty in this assurance--happens to astound me, leaves me speechless.
Yet again, I made copies and shared in ice cream cake with the office, and Lou told me that we share something in common, that we tend to associate ourselves with those much younger....I braided Megan's hair, prepared some more for VBS, finished decorating the room...and managed to actually feeling the stress of being stretched in the office. I finally happened upon a familiar face with lunch with Kady, and it was a welcome relief and blessing to catch up. A few more hours were spent in the office and then, Lisa made it to the office and we ventured to eat Mexican and share in our adventures of past. We found a common liking in reality TV and Latinos. I came back to the house and went out on a drive with Carl and Lee, a nice distraction. It feels almost natural now, and for that I am grateful. So no matter how hard my story may be for some to take in, I would change not one aspect. Everything has led me to this place where I am now; no matter that years ago I could have never imagined myself to do this, or have such a longing to be on a foreign field. I was reading today that we aren't to live our lives saying maybe some other time. Now is the time. So when it comes to this moment, I know that I couldn't just sit back and say maybe next time to venture this distance, or for that matter what is to come in July, and then soon after in the fall with language school---I must keep pressing onward, and not looking toward what is behind..I haven't got it all figured out yet, but I am not going to stop moving forward...this is all for Him.

Day Five:
I tried to make the trek to the church and pick up tickets this morning, but failed miserably in that area. The directions seemed to veer me off onto an unknown path and before I could forget how to get back to the familiar I just stopped. Yet, the only person that seemed to be upset with me was indeed, myself. I then, shadowed a meeting and was enlisted as the photographer for VBS. I was given some jobs to do with the discovery of my much-loved handwriting. So I once again, prepared some crafts for VBS, cut some projects in half, and created a sign-in sheet for the VBS Nursery. The girls met up with me not long after, and we practiced our song. Once that was over, I went into the main office and found Lou and asked him if there was something I might be able to do--and so it happened that the next few hours we worked side by side sending out job openings to different universities. Oh, I also saw Sara Rodriguez, who was adamant that if I was ever to get in a bind to give her a call, or let her know if I needed anything at all. So yes, my days may seem boring to most, but I find myself in quiet agreement with them. It seems that no matter how little the jobs are that I have completed they seem to be helping out these dear people--cause with each day that passes I am receiving quiet affirmation. I am basking in God's peace and He has indeed showered me with contentment here. So much so, I am having trouble figuring out when I should leave. I sit here, in silent amazement, because God takes the most frightening circumstances in my eyes, and He turns them around into something beautiful. Oh the miles, these eyes have seen, the people this heart has loved--all of these are a gift from the Father.

My day ended with dinner with the Lane's, a comical affair, maybe at least a hour and a half, close to two hours because our waitress forgot to send our order to the kitchen, and then when it finally arrived the man helping her ended up dropping half of mine. Oh, it was quite the release, after what seemed like a long day for all of us. Stories were shared, and I must say that the comfort level here is also growing. For this truth, I could not be any more grateful; because even those who aren't experiencing such express their hesitancy when I share it. Though I don't think I could ask for a better home. Laughter is shared almost every day, and each day that passes I learn something new...

Day Six:
Oh how good it is, to be off and away from the busyness and stretched life of living it up in the office. I ended up reading an entire book and helping Lee put up blinds, which was another comical affair. Resting up on the balcony and then eating outside culminated my day..

Day Seven:
So I woke up pretty early with having to be at the church at 8:30 with the girls, so they could practice. When I got to the church it was just Covenant and I, and immediately I met this adorable nine-year old girl named Hannah who became my close friend, and tagged along with me. Hannah mentioned she needed to fill out a prayer card and pray for her mom to be able to come to church. Oh, that struck a chord. It is completely evident as to why Jesus encouraged His disciples and His people to have child-like faith. The DVD didn't want to work at first, so I was told by this woman to run up to the balcony. Problem was, today was my first Sunday..and it is my first week here. And of course she didn't realize I had no idea how to get up to the sound room. Yet, everything got straightened out and the girls practiced twice and then the service began. Announcements were made, and the girls followed. They did really well for the little time we had practiced. Right after that Lou went up to the pulpit and said I am sure that you all were able to see the girls from the stage, but probably not the girl up in the front row helping them out. So with that mini-introduction, he had me stand up so the church could welcome me. After that I ventured to Hannah's classroom so she could show me around and introduce me to her teachers, and then I went to the four and five year-old room. It was a little crazed, just like I remember. It was wonderful to be back around children, though. Amazing how little time it takes before they walk over and sit right beside you or hold your hand. When church was over we went out to eat with Carl's parents, which was really nice.

I almost feel a little juvenile as I attempt to gather my thoughts and recount my day. Yet, I figure if anything this is what I will go back to, in hopes of finding a somewhat good thought in the bunch of rambled madness. Otherwise the constant going that is seeming to become my routine would drain me of having any memory of the small blessings here and there and along the way...

1 comment:

  1. Sister,

    I am so blessed to be reminded that God can use us anywhere and everywhere. Never forget that it is really about knowing Him and whatever it takes to do that. I love you so much, MOM

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