Spontaneity, does the heart good.

Last night, I received a text message from my dear cousin, Jacque, with an invitation to join her and our Grandma for a girls night. What a welcome invitation, perfect timing. And for that, I thank You, because it was Your doing, I am sure. I ended up pulling up in front of my Grandma's apartment and was welcomed by my very missed cousin at the door. Two Starbucks in hand for the ladies, and my Grandma had the purest sense of delight and surprise on her face. It's one of those moments, that you will just never be able to forget.

In that moment she wasn't near her eighty years, she was a girl just into her twenty-somethings. A girl whose bright smile, lit up her quaint little place that is her's to call her own, an endearing sense of accomplishment, courage, and pure joy.

And so what did three girls just entering their twenty-somethings do? We talked about where we've been, where we're going, what we're doing. We laughed. We dreamed. We fancied the thoughts that most girls thrive upon, but us, we are just getting used to the idea. We spoke of past memories and talked of the future with bright eyes, full of hopeful expectation. We admitted to not having everything figured out, but wouldn't it be nice? We ate macaroni and cheese at 1:15 in the morning with toast. We watched "Say Yes to the Dress" and talked about what we would do in the place of these crazy girls willing to spend an outrageous amount of money on their dresses. And we laughed some more, fully convinced that when our day comes we would like to spend as little as we can, and turn that into something beautiful. We reminisced of the glory days when I would pretend to be sick...just so I could venture over to Grandma's house and play restaurant/store and pretend to be Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. Not a moment went to waste, in this dear reunion.

We told ourselves to embrace eating, for what it is, to forgo the calorie count and drink the tradition worthy, Mt. Dew. We talked and talked until 2 in the morning, and Grandma finally bid us goodnight. To which Jacque and I switched places so Grandma could finally sleep, and finished off our chat after three this morning. We finished off our time together with the movie, "He's Just Not That Into You" and breakfast.

Amidst our conversation I realized that, I like to think these days.

I like to let my dreams take flight, instead of keeping them held up inside my heart. I like to think about what may come, even though I am somewhat scared at all the uncertainty it brings. I guess I have held back for so long, it feels freeing to just let go, to be open, to finally....let down the walls that I have held up for far too long.

"Nothing you love is lost. Not really. Things, people-they always go away, sooner or later. You can't hold them, any more than you can hold moonlight. But if they've touched you, if they're inside you, then they're still yours. The only things you ever really have are the ones you hold inside your heart.”

I have my hopes and my dreams about many, many things. I am beginning to realize that's okay. Is it difficult? Yes, very. The time, the distance, they all play a significant role. But God has a purpose in this, and that brings such great comfort to my timid heart.